soco makes me soso

Guess what’s awesome? Go on, take a shot…

I get to work up front again all day!

Yes. That is correct. She needed another day off! TO FIND A CAR!

REALLY BITCH? I WILL FUCK YOUR SHIT UP, GET A SHINY ONE BECAUSE I AM GOING TO KEY THE SHIT OUT OF IT WHEN I HAVE A CHANCE! YOU HOOKER TOOTHED NASTY BITCH FROM HELL! I WANT TO CHOKE YOU TO DEATH AND WATCH YOUR EYES DIE!!! UGH!?!

I will kill her. I swear to God. I have a headache like you would not believe. It literally feels like someone stuck a whisk behind my eyes and is mixing my brain into a nice froth. Oh my ocular cavities! I can’t drink on work nights. In moderation yes, but not the combo I had last night. Soco does not mix with vodka, ever. Just don’t do it! I’m just happy I only had one shot, surely another one would have killed me?!

Don’t get me wrong. I’m not hungover. I just have a headache. No vomiting or excessive pooping.

I don’t want to be here. I just don’t think I can do six plus hours being cheerful and being nice to people. I seriously can’t. I want to cry. I feel tears coming. I SHOULD HAVE CALLED IN!

I need to calm down. Let us think back to last night when the impossible happened. Satan and I met the male versions of us. Seriously, it was ridiculous. Chris and Colin. Adorable, but not doable.

Here is my theory on Adorable vs. Doable… Boys who are fun to hang out with are usually adorable. Most times it’s figuratively not literally, but goodun’s none the less. Boys who are doable are just that. Those two never coincide. They never shake hands so to speak.

(A+++ for me remembering that!)

Back to Chris and Colin, they were fun. They were snarky and such just like us. Hopefully they’ll be up at Acapulco’s on Friday so we can shoot the shit again. I just think it was meant to be for us to hang out with them. A meeting of the minds if you will…

After all of our festivities we parted ways and went to Perkins. Ugh. Gag. Pish.

That was so not necessary! Fried bread and french fries! Jesus.

After that I dropped Satan off at her car and proceeded home. I was going like 60 in a 50 zone and all of a sudden I see a fucking deer prancing (not running) across the highway. Fuck! Ok. Slamming brakes, squealing tires, heart stopping. And I still hit the fucker! Not hard enough to do damage to my car or it hopefully, but Christ! It staggered for a second and then booked it into a field.

Only I have the luck to hit a deer on the way home. This is the second time too!

I immediately called Satan and said a lot of “oh my gawds!” and “I’m going to poop!” It wasn’t cute. I had to share that with someone. The guy I’m seeing ditched me so I was sure as shit wasn’t calling him. Dick.

But he got his last night. He called and I made him feel like shit because I cried. Not really sure why I cried but it felt good. Sometimes you just need a good cry… I DID MY BEST!

People here at work are fucking ridiculous. I love when I have to screen their calls for them because God forbid they have to deal with that customer that they have been avoiding all week. If you just did your fucking job (which isn’t hard, by the way) in the first place, people wouldn’t be hounding your ass. Is this so complex to understand? I don’t care if you don’t want to talk to them… It’s really not my problem. And if you really don’t want to take the call I’ll just give it to my supervisor to take. See how much fun I can be? Asshats.

I’m officially starving. I’m so hungry. Except I don’t want to go out and get anything! It is so cold out. I think I’m going to say fuck it and starve. I have pudding in the fridge at work, that’ll get me by. I really, really, really hope they let me go at 6pm.

Well, that’s all I’ve got. I’m mentally and physically depleted.