ode to satan / farewell / angry

1 hour 37 minutes and counting…

I know bitching about a three and a half hour shift may seem ridiculous, but I’m doing it anyway. I’m fucking tired. I got maybe an hour of sleep and I now have a headache and I’m a teeny bit irritable. Weird right?

I’m going on vacation as of tomorrow and I’m excited/sad about the whole affair. First off I’m pumped to sit on my ass in the sun to drink and read for six days but at the same time it’s all so bittersweet because it’ll be without Satan. Literally the first vacation in the past two years that I’ve taken without her! San Francisco, sniff… Sorry, reminiscing. Ok, I’m back. Yeah, I don’t care how long I have to drive daily I will find a signal and call her. I can’t make it with SF#2 for six days alone.

I feel like a lot of my time will be spent out in the wilderness swearing, stumbling, smoking and looking for a signal.

Side Note... My eye just did the twitchy/cock thing when I heard our IT Guy shoot his Nerf gun. It’s like a machine gun filled with rubber bullets. If he ever so much as points that thing at me I will castrate him and make him wish he was never born. Not necessarily in that order. Fucker. God that pissed me off.

Today will be interesting; I still have to run a whole bunch of errands and pack. I’m notorious for forgetting stupid things, so I’m hoping I have everything. I for sure need to bring my copy of Breaking Dawn. Although I’m not exactly thrilled about that one, I’m hearing things I don’t want to know about it. I just have to get it over with though.

Ok, could the sun be any fucking brighter today? I have to sit up front and the reflection off cars is blinding. I’m almost hiding behind the computer so I can not be hit every six seconds. Jesus. Dick.

(Did I just call the sun a dick? I’m mentally ill…)

Tonight we’re going to our spot for boozy treats, I’m amped. I need one right now. Seriously, a fucking screwdriver sounds amazing. Yum, a bloody mary? I’ll stop; I’m getting myself all sorts of shades of excited.

While writing this blog I’m trying to be sneaky and look for a cd/mp3 combo player for up at the cabin at target.com. I can’t find anything under sixty and I’m bitter. I’m not asking for the world people! I don’t need a clock or eight speaker surround sound, just a cheap one that will end up in my bathroom when we get back. Ugh, I was thinking of like forty at the most. I’m poor! Shit is going on my CC anyway.

That search was fruitless.

Ok, people get over it now please! I’m here early, does everyone that walks by need to comment on it? That’s everyone so far. I get it, it’s not normal. I’m so sorry to have ruined your routine. Shut the fuck up, kay thanks!

I’m getting ornery. These people bother me on a very distinct level.

I need caffeine. But at the same time no I don’t, I want to take a nap when I get home not sit there and jiggle my knee until it breaks free of the tendons. But it sounds delightful right now, did I mention delightful? Sigh.

I can no longer work, thus I just tossed all of the notes that I get daily in the recycle. At this point I don’t really care. There is nothing I can do about them anyway in the next hour and I really don’t want to see them next Friday when I get back. I’d much rather have someone else deal with them while I’m gone.

Its someone else’s turn. It’s been hell for the last two weeks, there are only three of us who work in my department and we’ve all scheduled our vacations for the last three weeks. First it was Heidi off, so Anissa and I had to deal with all of her issues and her hidden shit. Anissa is off this week, and we’re so far behind it’s not funny. And finally me! I’ve had two weeks of bullshit. I deserve this vacation.

I’d love to sit here for another hour and bitch, but I should probably post this now.

On a more personal note:

I’ll miss you Satan. Whenever you’re sad and depressed just remember I’m in the wilderness being eaten alive by bugs, pissed off and worked up over Breaking Dawn, trying my hardest not to strangle SF#2, and generally just missing you too. Text often!

Hugs and kisses,
(but not in a creepy way)

El Diablo

P.S. If you kill bitchy kitty make it look like a suicide… he he he.