smithereens and twats

A conversation through text Satan and I shared... I'll let you draw your own conclusions.

Me: The fucking blue line came back!

Satan: What blue line?

Me: On my phones screen. I want to smash this piece of shit to smithereens!

Satan: You have insurance don’t you? New phone time.

Me: I think I’m going to the store after school tomorrow. Fucking bastard! Maybe I’ll turn it off.

Satan: Deep breathing. Call it a cunt. It’s pink after all.

Me: It’s red – Bloody Bastard!

Satan: Ha ha ha ha! That conversation may need to be captured forever.

Me: Ha. Ok, I just reread that we are witty SOB’s.

Satan: This is true. And so humble about that fact too.

Me: It’s our goodness and purity of heart that makes us saints.

Satan: Sigh, truer words have never been spoken.

Me: Someday soon monuments will be erected in our honor.

Satan: We really are gifts sent from above.

Me: Cherubs and such.

Satan: People will rue the day they ever crossed us once they realize who we are. Insignificant twats!

Me: LMAO you busted out twats. Oh snap.

Satan: He he he! Yes I did. It made me giggle. God damn it we are funny!

Me: Put that shit in the book.

Satan: LMAO! I JUST SNORTED!

Me: Smithereens and twats will do that to you. Oof.