our version of mastercard/legendary

One bottle of Kettle One: $22.00 (Gone in an instant)
Two taco’s a piece: Zero Dollars (Delicious)
Three drunken phone calls: Zero dollars (‘What did I say again?’)
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Finding a huge piece of ground beef in your best friends hair the morning after: Priceless.

Besides fucking MOUTH ruining the evening and the vicious hangover I had, last Friday night was pretty legendary. I honestly remember few things. The highlights would have to be:

1. Satan and I hugging and sobbing in her kitchen, for no apparent reason.

2. Satan and I blasting Pink, for no apparent reason.

3. Satan calling her aunt and uncle, for no apparent reason.

4. Me calling John for 3 minutes and 12 seconds, I don’t remember a word said.

5. Me falling down the stairs and bruising more than just my dignity.

6. Satan and I watching UFC and drooling over the hot men.

7. Me sitting on the bathroom floor vomiting and blacking out.

8. Me stealing Mouths bed. I would never do this, I believe I was goaded into this.

9. Satan and I having ‘balls’ written on our heads by Mouth.

10. Mouth telling me I have a fat head, jerk.

11. Waking up in a strange bed (shut the shell up to anyone with any comments that it happens all the time, rude) looking up and seeing a huge deer head, scared the bejezus out of me.

Those are just a few of the highlights… I will never get that drunk again. No, I’m not claiming I’ll never drink in that excess again. It was destructive and debilitating. I literally could not go to church the next day. It took me two days to recover and when I finally felt better I got sick. I think I killed my liver. A lot of other things have happened in the last few days so I'll have to post those later...

Oh and FYI I think SFB is getting fired, she fucked with the wrong person. I'll update ya'll on that later... Dun dun dun!